Anne's Final Words

While not in her customary blogging style that we all love, Anne’s family and friends will close her blog by sharing Anne’s own words.  She took the initiative to write her own obituary below.  We also pulled from her last full blog post her wishes for us as we continue on in life. She helped decide where donations in her memory could be made.

Anne was a remarkable family member, friend, and colleague.  Her impact is long lasting and she will live on in our hearts. 

Obituary:

On February 26, 2023, the limits of current medical treatments were reached and Anne R Crecelius died peacefully from metastatic breast cancer in hospice care at home surrounded by her loving family.  She is survived by mother Barbara, sisters Karyn (Adam) and Sarah (James) and brother Marc (Marisa).  She loved her nieces (Carmen, Annabelle, Alice and Violet) and nephews (Colin and Myles) and dearly missed her departed father Lee.

Anne was a Professor at the University of Dayton, having achieved this final academic promotion in the year of her passing.  While she did not have children of her own, her students became like her kids and are a part of her living legacy.  She mentored students in her research lab, taught with energy and passion in her classes, and connected with students through advising.  The University of Dayton community, which she first entered as an undergraduate in 2003 and returned as a faculty member in 2013 after obtaining graduate degrees at Colorado State University, was her local family.  Colleagues across the institution became friends, and Anne’s influence was far ranging through countless committees and service obligations.  Her influence was not limited to her local institution as she was also active in nationwide efforts towards advancing physiology education.

Particularly after her initial diagnosis of Stage IV breast cancer in 2014, but even before, Anne took a ‘say yes’ mentality toward life.  She loved to travel, enjoy the outdoors, try new things, push herself physically and mentally, and was a tremendous friend.  In her last years, she continued to explore and spend time with those important to her, all while maintaining a productive work life and receiving treatments.  She chronicalled her story on her blog that was read by hundreds.   She wrote professionally about how she incorporated her diagnosis into her teaching and received several accounts of inspiration from near and far.

An initial prayer service will be hosted immediately today February 27th, 2023 at 2:30pm ET on the University of Dayton campus https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jXiP3aQ29I

Details on further memorial celebrations are to come.  

In lieu of flowers, donations are requested to: 

American Physiological Society www.physiology.org/donate (Select “Anne Crecelius Memorial Fund”)

University of Dayton https://www.givecampus.com/campaigns/26067/donations/new (The Professor Anne R Crecelius Fund for Innovation in Learning and Teaching)

Metavivor https://www.metavivor.org/take-action/donate/

Other wishes from Anne in her last post:

“Talk about death with someone you care about. Yours, mine, theirs, an aging parent's.  You think I might be joking, but I'm not. The conversations I'm having, the decisions I'm making are not easy.  But, it's something I've been thinking about for awhile, talking about with my family and it makes it far easier.  What are your priorities and wishes?  What is in order vs not? Please, have a hard conversation.

Add a note to the public kudoboard my dear friend set up https://www.kudoboard.com/boards/ByEKeBxB

Support each other.  Really...I know that this is hard for others too, so please, take care of each other while I focus on taking care of myself.”

We will miss you dearly, Anne, and carry you with us always.

First Week Home on Hospice Thoughts

Wow, the outpouring of support this past week has been pretty incredible.  I’ve heard from near and far…from long lost childhood best friends to the people I see everyday.  So many of you have shared with me good thoughts, the influence I’ve had. It’s all pretty overwhelming.  It’s a good thing I’ve been engaged in some deep work around self-love and self-acceptance otherwise I’d really be screwed trying to accept all this love!  And lots of you have had those hard conversations around death and dying…good work!

Home from hospital with my new O2 concentrators

This first week at home has been pretty interesting.  We were set up with the two oxygen concentrators that deliver up to 10 L/min O2 each (almost 100% O2).  This helps relieve a lot of my anxiety over not having enough oxygen in the house vs at the hospital.  Upon arrival at home, that night a hospice nurse came to check in.  It would the first of many visits from hospice folks over the next few days.  Respiratory, LPN, social worker, my main nurse, the docs, etc.  My main nurse/care coordinator will visit at least once a week to check in, while the others are on-call.  There’s a 24/7 number we have that connects to nurses so that’s another helpful support.  As I get closer to the end, we can move to a critical care team where a nurse will be around consistently and able to deliver comfort meds like morphine and Ativan to ensure a peaceful end.  That’s really my main goal, which they seem to support…making sure that my last breaths aren’t panicked or gasping.  They seem to think that’s a reasonable goal.

Thanks Andria for my spirit animal sloth…fondly named Stuie

Among the visitors from hospice have been a steady stream of friends and colleagues coming over to visit.  It’s great to catch up with people, hear what’s going on, and I imagine good for them to see me too.  I’ve been able to work a little, zooming into meetings and such.  Mom is getting quite the education in the dynamics of higher education listening to these convos!  

 

Visitors from near and far!

The past two days have been a little less great than others…needed to turn my oxygen up a bit at times.  I’m trying to not obsess about my oxygen saturation numbers and go more on how I feel…but it’s hard for me to not collect the data!

I credit my mom also for dealing with how I deal with things, which is mostly out-processing and talking through things.  My wishes for celebrations of life, dividing assets, etc.  We’ve covered pretty much all of it.  I finished a book I highly recommend A Beginner’s Guide to the End .  It’s a really nice, easy to read coverage of a lot of important end of life topics.  It’s sort of the What to Expect When Expecting but for a different important transition in life.  

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I would have thought I’d be blogging more, but honestly my days have been pretty full!  Between working, visitors, and the occasional nap, I’m usually tied up 8-6.  Then eating one of the delicious delivered dinners and it’s basically time for bed.  But I’d rather be busy than laid up in bed!  I’ll for sure update with any major changes…for now it’s mostly status quo at home.

Queen Riley enjoying the new mobility aides.

A New Phase

Hi friends.  Some of you may already be aware of what will come below, either because you've seen a similar message on UD email, text or passed along by others.  It's pretty difficult and semi-overwhelming to keep track of updating people as I'm blessed to have many people from different stages of my life that care about it.  So please don't take any offense to the order in which you hear news these days.

First and foremost, thanks to everyone for your kind words, thoughts, prayers, and support during this time.  Anyone who knows me knows I appreciate clear and open communication, so here's my attempt at it! 

Health Update/Status

On Monday 1/6 I went to the emergency room after struggling to maintain my oxygen saturations at home, despite the supplemental oxygen I've been using since December.  This was similar to what brought me to the hospital for a brief stay right after Christmas.  The breast cancer that has metastasized to my lungs (and liver and some bones) has been stubbornly resistant to all of treatments we've tried in the past 2+ years since I was diagnosed stage iv in March 2020.  Nothing 'else' on top of my cancer progression is happening (e.g. infection, etc). And, we've exhausted the treatments for the cancer.  So with my discharge on Friday, we've set up hospice at home to help support the new phase of really prioritizing my comfort rather than trying to treat the disease.  Fortunately, providing lots of oxygen support and taking things slowly (the hospital doc told me my new spirit animal is a sloth!) has so far been doing its job to keep me doing well.  We'll continue to manage symptoms as things progress towards the end (on a timeline that it just really unknown right now).  Back in October, I made the decision to not teach classes this semester and do modified duties, so I have a fair amount of flexibility work-wise.  The next step/stage will be a more significant draw down towards full leave from work.

Support and Needs

I'm lucky that my mom has been able to be here with me, and over the past month or so have had a number of out-of-town family and friend visitors to support me.  My UD family and local support is also strong and for that I am so grateful.  Really, there isn't much right now that we 'need'.  Really.  But I know that folks want to help, so here are some ways that you can support me now and in the coming time, however long that may last.  Some of these obviously lend themselves more to local folks...I'm trying to brainstorm ways for those further away (there are many of you!) as well. If you have ideas, please share.  At this point I"m in good enough energy/capabilities that I can 'handle' pretty much whatever.

• Talk about death with someone you care about. Yours, mine, theirs, an aging parent's.  You think I might be joking, but I'm not. The conversations I'm having, the decisions I'm making are not easy.  But, it's something I've been thinking about for awhile, talking about with my family and it makes it far easier.  What are your priorities and wishes?  What is in order vs not? Please, have a hard conversation.

• If you'd like to bring a meal or make a visit to me at home, please let me know via this calendar/spreadsheet.  It's an attempt to keep things organized and spread the love.  Right now, all is welcomed and when/if that changes, I'll let folks know.

• Add a note to the public kudoboard my dear friend set up.

• Reach out...text, email, etc.  Please just know that if I don't respond (promptly or at all) it doesn't mean I don't appreciate it!  

• Support each other.  Really...I know that this is hard for others too, so please, take care of each other while I focus on taking care of myself.

• Stay tuned.  There will be more to come in ways to support and things are changing day by day it seems. 

  I will likely update the blog more often than I have been.  I'll try to remember to add to FB and emails and whatnot.  But also please know that no news does not necessarily mean bad news.  When the end comes, folks will be informed, there will be services, funds to support, etc.  Don't worry about that.  Until then, I will attempt to find a balance of my "out processing", staying in the moment, rest, work, etc.
  

  To no one's surprise for people that know me, I have a lot to say!  About the past week, about hospice and what it really means, about the things I've been thinking, etc. It isn't going to happen this second or in a single post (she writes to remind herself).   Patience is appreciated, and necessary!

  Till then, I'm going to rest up a bit for football later!