The lack of posting isn’t a bad sign...quite the opposite in fact. I’ve been busy enjoying family, life, sun, etc. In the past 2 weeks since posting after my first appointment at Stanford, there’s been so much to be grateful for. Pardon the lack of narrative, but bullet points and visuals seem most efficient.
I’M SO GRATEFUL FOR...
- Getting to share Thanksgiving with 2 sisters+families and virtually with Mom and Boise crew.
- A ridiculously amazing video of friends, colleagues, family and students sharing their love and well wishes that my former student Amy put together and sent me on Thanksgiving. I bawled. It was amazing. For all those that contributed and may see this, if I didn't say thanks personally it's because the emotion was just a bit too much. As my colleague Jon said I "don't handle compliments well". I will rewatch when I need a boost. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
- Pie (I can't stay serious and sappy for too long...)
- Having activity and fun built in to normal daily life here...on Thanksgiving and other days (my pickleball game is improving...)
- Caroake caroling up and down the hill.
- Lunchtime views like this.... (I am working : ) ... the 9:30 Eastern time zone start of my classes is a bit early, but thankfully I'm an early riser). The benefit is finishing up the day while the sun is still up in most cases, allowing for outdoor activity like post-work hikes to relieve workplace BS (I'm still trying to avoid the "B", though somewhat unsuccessfully).
- Impromptu dance parties around the fireplace. "PA RUM PA PUM!!"
- Our family text chain and the December 6 Word Story Challenge, keeping us all feeling together and showing the creativity of all!
- A fantastic weekend getaway to Pinnacles National Park with Sarah and fam, snuck in before California shut-down. A couple days of hiking, hanging with the little one (a pretty darn good hiker in his own right!), seeing Condors way close, a little climbing at Sisters rock, 'glamping' (in a chilly tent cabin), crazy cool manzanita trees with ginormous pine cones, first time making s'mores for Myles, reservoir reflections, new book, probably driving my bro-in-law crazy, and lots of sunshine!
- Cats that like snuggles and pets a bit more than my Riley does.
- Our sustainable outdoor Christmas Tree (awesome idea Karyn!)
- Treatment Monday at Stanford that went well...
- I had to do a clinic visit with doc at hospital location in morning before the infusion in the afternoon at a different location. Labs looked good and the onc said I didn't have to see him before next couple infusions. Turns out I didn't actually qualify for the clinical trial here anyways (not enough amplification) so put at ease any lingering feelings I had about that.
- Between appointments, I picked up some lunch and went to Sarah's house so I could teach class (since no coffeeshops or anything to camp out in...thankfully traffic is light and all locations are within a 25 min or so radius). Thanks for the Zoombomb Sarah!
- Infusion center is part of the outpatient clinic. It's a bit more formal than I'm used to....private rooms, pre-heating arm for IV, multiple folks on hand in the process. They don't do the pre-treatment steroid I normally get at home, but couldn't tell much of a difference. I caught up on some TV (yes, Grey's Anatomy is still on, and yes I still watch it), got my "magic milk" and headed back to Karyn's.
- I'm doing this "Streakers" group on FB...20 min of exercise every day for December and needed to get it in, so did an hour of Just Dance with the girls. Including a still from the video of us doing #thatPOWER, apropos to a post-chemo, still have hospital band and iv bandage on routine.
- The good deed chain that St. Nick brought the fam. Jokes, hugs, pictures. I laughed when I saw what Karyn said my superpower was....have you met me? I NEVER consider my self a positive person, but as she said, sometimes our superpower can also be our kryptonite. I"m grateful to be able to turn on my positivity when I need to.
- All the positivity in the world still can't match up to the reality sometimes. I just heard a bit ago that a colleague, friend, mentor and fellow stage IV cancer patient had passed after rapidly deteriorating and going into hospice late last week. I'm grateful to have known him, if even for a short time...to have passed notes at meetings, listened to his wisdom on leadership and academia, to have shared in the bond of chemo scheduled on our calendars, and to hear how his faith comforted him in these dark times. The world lost a really, really, good one. I will miss you John.
- I'm grateful to have been here with family, able to go interrupt the girls before class started (or after, as was Annabelle's case but was doing the 'camera off' thing) and give them a big hug, with tears in my eyes and tell them why I love them. It shouldn't take loss or a silly Christmas paper chain to inspire that kind of action, but sometimes we all need the reminder and the kick in the ass.
