I'm actually not in much of a laughing mood. Lots of "tellings" today. My grad student, my fellow faculty members, my dean. I held it together through all of them (I'm good at that, I can sort of distance myself emotionally) but it takes a lot out of me. People are shocked. I can see it in their faces. They ask different questions..."is there a family history?" "where are you going for treatment". Most have stories to share "I know (insert random person here) who went through this". All express their condolences (as any decent person with half a heart would). As my mom and I discussed, it's a lot like when my dad died. I'll be glad when more people just know and this part is over.
So yeah, it was a long day. Add onto that a frustrating faculty meeting (as much as life can change, some things stay the same) plus having to contemplate what opportunities I do and don't pursue this academic year (is this going to be too much?!) and I was ready to leave work early. High point of the work day was lunch with some of the very good friends I'm thankful to have made that provide such a welcome break so often. I could go on about more of the emotions, and I will at a later time, but Alice's arrival yesterday delayed what I was planning on writing on....
MY WELCOME PACKET!!
Disclaimer: As the post title may imply, I am light-hearted in the most serious of times. It's how I cope. Many in my family do as well. My brother's response to the URL of this blog was pretty priceless and along the humorous lines. So if this offends you, too bad. In times like this I think people need to "do what they need to do", and for me, that's stay my sarcastic self.
So this welcome packet. I was handed it by the PA at the surgeon's office when I was first taken back from the waiting room and it seriously felt a lot like the welcome packet when I moved into my last apartment, minus a coupon for free pizza and a trial membership at the gym.
One of the highlights by far is the "tlc" catalog from the American Cancer Society. Think hats, special bras, and fake boobs. I few of the visual highlights.
The "halo" that Beyonce was singing about?
This either makes total sense...or no sense at all.
Even cancer is no excuse for an embroidered denim bucket hat.
Browsing the catalog was actually probably helpful in things "sinking in"....yes I would wear a scarf, turbans are weird, "cancer hats" are extra long and cover your ears, oh yeah, eyebrows are hair too, wigs aren't as expensive as I thought...
The other information in the folder of fun was somewhat helpful, and much of it I had seen before. The American Cancer Society has a lot of info online, similar to what is in these books. Another helpful site I've been using is http://www.breastcancer.org/ that also has a handy mobile app for tracking the diagnosis (stage, grade, etc). The Beyond the Shock iOS app has some informative, albeit cheesy, videos as well that explain a lot too.
Perhaps laughing at wig styles I didn't know existed, semi-politically correct prosthetic breasts, and awful fashion statements might not be the best coping mechanism, but it has lightened my mood, and that was needed today. I'll say again, it's my cancer and I'll laugh if I want to... hope you can too.
**I know some folks have had trouble with comments...working on it, but keep trying :) Thanks for letting me know.
