Weekend Warrior-ing

Yes, I'm obsessed with alliteration as you can probably tell from my post titles.  Deal with it.  I'm cheesy.

Anywho, a bit of a weekend update!

Friday's treatment was not without note...Bless her heart, Nurse Deena (who got a lovely dye job to a darker brown) was trying to be efficient and not wait a full 30 min after my pre-drug steroid/antihistamine mix and started the Taxol (the real chemo drug) a little early.  Apparently I need the full 30 because I had a bit of an infusion reaction.  Facial blushing, throat/chest tightness...not to the same extent as the first time around, but it was there.  Taxol was stopped, more Decadron (steroid) was given, and all was well. 

After treatment, the standard meetings and such on a Friday afternoon and then home for a relaxing night, per usual catching up on TV, heading to bed early.  I started reading a good book, Boys in the Boat which also per usual, I'm trying to consume in moderation.  This was after I did in fact read my buddy's dissertation while awake at night.  Can always learn something!

There's a great website I may have mentioned before, called Unf*ck Your Habitat that was sort of the theme for the weekend.  The motto for this site is "You're better than your mess" and it's true.  I am better than the mess that my house has been lately, inside and out.  And, while cancer is definitely a good excuse for a lot of things, I was letting it be an excuse for a 'regular' habit I have, of making my living space sort of trashy and a mess (my sister Sarah would die!), particularly all week long.  So I had in mind that I would do some unf*cking this weekend.  The fact the forecast called for snow (I can join in the rest of the country's fun!) further motivated me to get some things in order. 

Saturday I spent raking/bagging leaves (thanks Mom and Dad for always living places without big tress growing up....), mowing the lawn (hopefully one last time) and moving the patio furniture under the protective patio roof.

City of Dayton requires them bagged!

 

I then spent an afternoon grading exams and watching college football and an evening reading that damn book. Oh, and the cookies.  My wonderful Singapore cousin sent a terrific care package that had some of the most delicious chocolate chip cookies I've eaten in some time.  Thanks Kris, they were amazing!

 

After another lazy morning, late breakfast and book reading (they're on their way to the Olympics!) I knew what I had to do.  It was time for some major cleaning...

 

So far on this blog I've shared my feelings, my fears, my highs and my low.  I've shared my bald head and my weight gain, my doctor's reports, both good and bad.  What I'm about to share is almost more embarrassing and harder for me...The joy of living alone is being able to hide your messes from the world.  I have, on a number of occasions, invited people over with motivation to clean being a major reason for the gathering.  I can be a slob.  Maybe I am a slob.  But, I'm capable of cleaning up.  So here they are, the before and after from my day of unf*cking. 

 

And, for the first time pretty much ever since I left home to go to college...

That's a car in a garage!  Wahoo!



 

So I didn't spend the weekend exercising, but it was a bit of work and something for me to accomplish.  As I finished my 4th treatment on Friday, I have been thinking a lot about where I'm currently at.  It is quite easy to forget about the cancer.  Then I see a reflection.  Oh that's right, I don't have hair.  (sidenote, definite silver lining to cancer...swiffering my floors is much less disgusting as they aren't covered in my hair).  Then a card or package shows up and I'm reminded of the support.  Then I scratch an itch and feel my port buried in my skin.  Then I feel Bertha, who seems more like Baby Bertha these days (again with my alliterative obsession...). 

 

I realize I'm not "through" this yet.  Not even close.  But I would be remiss to not acknowledge where I've come from and where I'm at.  I'm at a place where physically, I've changed much (some good, some bad) and mentally, am such a stronger person than I was a few months ago.  Or, maybe that's not true.  Maybe I'm the same person I was, I just believe in myself a bit more.  I was having a conversation with the shrink about how I've surprised myself with my positive attitude throughout this.  I tend not to be a positive person, and I've had really dark days in the past.  She countered by reminding me though that throughout life I've faced challenges head on and most often succeeded, so why would cancer be any different?  I thought about it, and she's probably right...I guess I don't pay her for nothing.

 

This is a roundabout post, I realize.  Perhaps I just needed a bit of a mind unf*ck as well today.  A cleaning out of what's been rattling around for a bit in an attempt to make room for the new and see what is actually there.